Tag:Chicago Bears
Posted on: September 6, 2009 1:54 am

Da Bearss!

The greatest comedy is the comedy that is a true reflection of the reality in which we live.

Based on Bears fans' reactions after the Cutler deal I have gained a new respect for the early nineties SNL Bear fan parodies featuring Mike Myers and Chris Farley, among others.

The Bears fans are so pumped by the signing of Jay Cutler that they have reverted to Ditka era form.  Please don't give a reasonable argument for why the Bears might not make the playoffs this year.  You will have 50 fanatics cursing you for even considering that the Bears may not succeed.

In honor of the classic SNL sketcches, I would like to update them to accurately reflect modern Chicago fans.

Host: "Alright everybody, it's time for season predictions.  Everyone please give your opinion of how the Bears' season will play out.  Personally, I think that 15-1 is a distinct possibility."

Fan #1: "16-0.  The Packers play us close, but Cutler pulls it out in the end."

Fan #2: "Undefeated season.  This is the year that Don Shula is finally disappointed."

Fan #3:  "15-1, due to a blown call against Cutler by Ed Hochuli."

Host:  "O.K.  We all seem to be in agreement about that issue.  Now I would like to ask you to predict how the Bears will due against Favre and the Vikings.  Who wins?"

Fan #1:  "Da Bears.  Cutler throws seven TD's to Earl Bennett.  52-17."

Fan#2:  "Da Bears!"

Fan#3:  "Da Bears knock Favre out early and manhandle Jackson on their way to a 35-2 victory."

Host:  "Alright, but just to make it interesting, let's suppose that Cutler is only six inches tall.  The Bears have to play with a mini-Cutler."

Fan #1:  "Bears.  21-17."

Fans #2:  " Da Bears, but it's close."

Fan #3:  "DA BEARSS!"
Category: NFL
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